if i lose you now

if i lose you now
i will never be able to move again
this moment will freeze
and so will i

if i lose you now
i wont ever tell the time again
i wont know when we fell in love
i wont recall anything

if i lose you now
i wont ever see my hands again
they will be forever over my eyes
my palms over my cheeks

if i lose you now
i will atrophy
i will turn creased and brown like a wilting flower
and never bloom in the spring

if i lose you now
i wont ever sing again
you will be stuck in my throat forever
my breath wont get past you

if i lose you now
i will stay awake forever
in case i fall asleep and dream you're here
and wake up to horror. horror.

if i lose you now
i'll just sit and sit and be a thing
the matter, cells, or form of someone
inside someone else.